BB Should B Sleeping

First, an apology to, oh, everyone I know.

I've ignored you. Yes. You and you and you and you. Pretty much everyone I know has tried to call or email me this week.

(There was one flaming arrow shot into my front door. Hi Llorca, I'll call you as soon as I can, bro).

Here and there I can talk, but between work and this PAPER... I'm just swamped. It's the paper mostly. Each night I come home and stare at the laptop for hours, trying to get this bloody paper to fly.

And it's... sort of done. The rough draft is done. I've gotta go back and clean up the formatting, do a reference page give it a once-over... but the hard part is done. This one's been a bear, folks.

When I was in the LCDC program I once had to do a group project with:

A recovering needle drug addict whose clean days weren't into three digits yet.
A recovering meth addict whose still-using brother was prompting cops to come to their house almost daily.
A woman whose crack-addicted husband was wanted for felony evasion after he left the scene of a wreck he caused.

Getting the three of us together in a Denny's to do some writing was like some outtake from Naked Lunch.

This paper I'm wrapping up now was harder than that.

Heaven help you if you ever have to read anything by Tiedeman. I'm sure he was brilliant and his theory is useful. I would like to meet the person who has any idea exactly what in the name of Ronald McDonald the man was talking about though.

***

BB Should B Sleeping... that might have been a better name for this blog. It's a recurring theme, eh?

***

Want to know how swamped I've been? I've attended no Krav this week. Endorphin junkie that I am, I just couldn't squeeze it in.

***

A year ago I was unemployed, having been escorted from (insert call letters) for daring to refer to a manager there as "annoying" on this very blog. I wasn't fired; I'd already given two weeks' notice--with no other job waiting, mind you--and had a few days left when their snooping turned up a reason to send me home early. Fine, fine.

MOBB was in Italy. The kids were in daycare. I was attending Krav, drinking too much coffee, writing, looking for a job... it was stressful as hell, but you know, it was magical in a way.

***

I think any time in one's life is magical if you can just gather the perspective to step back and see it.

I can feel it now, believe it or not, even through the paper-induced semi-coma. In a few weeks I'll be seeing real clients. I'm entering my final two semesters of grad school. Part of me is scared to death, and part of me is ready, just ready.

Magical.

***

Sick THEGIRL tonight, as she edged up to the kitchen counter to watch me put some ham on her brother's dinner plate: "Hey Daddy what you make for supper--ACHOO!"

And she sneezed all over the ham.

Sigh.

I pitched that piece in the trash and hoped that was all she'd hit.

***

And now, face-first into the waiting arms of Morpheus.