Sunday's Musings

I am, for the most part, over myself. Thank you for bearing with me. I just had to vent a bit last night. I know that was a bit raw and aggressive.

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Wolfboy has a bug, dang it. The poor kid had a fever and just a little bit of a rattly cough. He acted sick for all of about 20 minutes today, then wanted snacks and was again his usual self. I'm not sure if that was the miraculous effects of ibuprofen or an indicator that maybe it was one of those freaky, passing childhood things. I remember having a few of those.

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It was a pretty good day here. MOBB works Sundays, so the kids and I were left to our own devices. First I hauled them to the school and did a good workout. (This was hours before Wolfboy turned up with the fever).

Some days I can just launch into a workout, the same way I hop out of bed in the mornings. Just BOOM, right into it.

Others, like today, I take my time stretching, pace on the mat a bit, sort of get my head straight, you know? The kids were cute when they came over next to me and mimicked my combinations and tried to do pushups with me.

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So yeah, today I fed the kids (guess that kind of goes without saying), mowed the yard, wrote a five page paper, vacuumed, and bought groceries. At 9:30 I still felt good enough that I briefly considered working out again. I'm just feeling especially motivated I guess.

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I listened to a bunch of my old demos today for the first time in quite a while. I had a decent little setup at one time, with a good four-track recorder, a decent drum machine, guitars, bass, keyboard, and an accordion.

Some of the stuff was just embarrassingly bad. I turned a Toland-penned song called "Miracle Man" into a half-rocker, half sloppy disco/jam bizarro tune. It was so bad it deserves a spanking.

I liked the blues number, "I'm Giving Up My Electric Guitar," though unfortunately I SANG on the bloody thing. Sheesh. I sunk quite a few decent to good songs by thinking I could cut vocals on them.

"You Paralyze Me," by Toland, was pretty doggone decent, if not for the... you know... vocals.

"Valentine's Day" was pretty good. Really captured this haunting, lovesick sound. That's a Toland song. And his "50 Years" was a good little number too. I still remember bringing in the fiddle player to record the solo like that was yesterday.

I still like my instrumental, "Possibilities," quite a bit. It's got some minor flubs (like misfrets), but I wrote that one right out of my heart and mind, finding the melody that I was hearing and making the fingers figure out how to make it work. And my acoustic song "If There Was a Way" is really quite a lovely little ballad. It's got a catchy accordion line, and my vocals don't muck it up too much for a change.

Then, of course, are my two "greatest hits." Sigh.

Twice in my life I wrote songs in about 10 minutes. One was the Ramones-meet-ZZ Top boogie tune "I Want a Dog." I was literally making it up on the spot, singing (and barking) into a microphone in my closet. Heck, I was still in my bathrobe.

The other, again written in about 10 minutes, was "You Broke the Shit Outta My Heart." It's a stumbling little country song that came from who knows where.

They're both puerile and dumb and in unbelievably bad taste... yet they've got a couple decent gags in them. And apparently, every time Toland meets someone new he says, "I know this guy named Brian, and you've gotta hear these two crazy songs he recorded..."

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I'm off tomorrow. I may end up caring for Wolfboy, unless he wakes up feeling miraculously better. I've gotta take an online final. I had some other stuff I really wanted to do, but it may have to wait.

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I called my grandmother today, as it's her 86th birthday. Babbi always keeps it short and sweet on the phone with me, just assuring me that she's doing well and that she had a good day. We had a good trip out to Ponchatoula to see her earlier this year, and I hope we get a chance to do it again relatively soon.

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Headed to Chicago with Hood in a couple weeks, and I'm looking forward to that. If you happen to have a connection to get us Cubbies/Cards tickets, I'm all ears...

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You know, though I hop straight out of bed in the mornings like I mentioned earlier, I'm not a morning person.

I'm a night owl.

This... this is my time. My time. There's only the sound of the ceiling fan as I sit here, doing one of my favorite things in the world. You're an active participant in my therapy--did you realize that? Who should be billing whom here?

But the silence practically hums, and time seems to stand still. I wish I could bottle this, let me tell you.

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Walk in peace. Sleep well. Be thankful that you have someone to cherish. I am.