A Diamond

This one's headed in lots of different directions. Forgive me. Hey, you want a cutesy little column on little old ladies who grow antique roses? Seek out your city newspaper. Or Paul Harvey or something.

***

It feels so GOOD to feel good. I feel healthy, strong... my hair's cut, I'm trim, I've got the super duper new jacket, new boots... I have moments where I feel like I look good. That's rare for me.

And I feel so strong and healthy, so far removed from Upchuck Amok '06 last Monday. Tomorrow I intend to return to Krav Maga. I sure as hell miss working out.

***

In fact, I feel like RUNNING. Yeah, I feel like loading the iPod with stomping stoner rock and taking to the track in the crisp night air. Or running bleachers even.

Unfortunately, I cannot. My leg pain persists. I've been talking to a marathon runner who helped me with some research, and my symptoms match compartment syndrome quite consistently. Different things I read give differing indications of the severity, but you know, it's been nearly a year since this first popped up. I figure it's time to see a doctor.

***

So with M.O.B.B. and the kids gone to Corsicana today, I enjoyed having a day to myself. I spent some time on a golf course today for a work function. I'd never been any closer than eating in some country club.

Gotta say... interesting environment. In some ways it's prim and proper, and in other ways it's 100% boys club attitude.

It wasn't a bad way to spend a few hours.

***

I figured I owed myself a nap.

I came home and read in the paper about the arrests of some murder suspects.

***

Over in Euless there's a car wash I went to once in a while. I thought they did a good job detailing M.O.B.B.'s car. So I took my little powder blue '89 Ford Escort over there once. The paint job was faded from all the years it sat under trees at our old apartment complex, covered in sap and who knows what else.

The guy who was going to work on my car was old, too old to be working such a job, if you know what I mean. His had to be the sort of life that leads one to washing cars for tips at almost 50. His face and teeth showed the hard times.

He looked at my car and said, "We'll have it shining like a diamond in a goat's ass."

I still don't know what that means, but I was suddenly curious to know.

***

And down the street from that car wash is a miniature golf place. I've never been, but you know, I drove past it all the time.

***

That's where, some days ago, four men knocked on the back door one morning and rushed the man who opened it. They muscled him around by his shirt collar, demanding he open the safe.

He did, and as they grabbed the loot one put a gun to the back of his head. He raised his hands and began to beg for his life. He didn't get to finish the sentence.

The thugs took two surveillance tapes from the place to cover their tracks.

They didn't know there was a third.

***

The take for each man who participated in the robbery was $150.

***

And that scenario is one we train in KM. I've done it many, many times.

And as I've said many, many times before, I'm not Bruce Lee, okay. I am not trying to say that I'd have whipped out my flawless KM on these thugs and had a different outcome.

But I will say that I don't anticipate having an assailant that close to me and trusting his good will to ensure that I'll still have my life when the robbery is over. It simply doesn't strike me as a wise bet.

***

So when I should have been napping today, with all the time I needed right there on my hands, I was going over gun drills in my head, over and over.

***

Ever feel someone's pain almost... tangibly?

***

BB's current therapy: "Searching with My Good Eye Closed" by Soundgarden.

***

Go love someone. Flirt with your partner. Glow a little bit. Try to remove yourself from the ticking of the clock just a bit. Understand that the pivotal moments in our lives don't come with soundtracks. Trumpets do not blare, voiceovers do not announce a change when someone gets sick, dies, falls in love, falls out of love...

Sit back and try to have some perspective on what's good in your life.