Daddy

THEBOY made a little book at school as a Father's Day gift for me.

Here's what it says:

My Daddy is the most wonderful Daddy in the world!

He is as handsome as a monkey.

He is as strong as a muscle.

He can lift 65 lbs and is 100 ft tall.

His favorite food is corn.

His favorite activity is eating.

In the good ole days when Daddy was little, he would brush his teeth.

I think my Daddy looks funny when he puts shaving cream on.

But I know he is really mad when he tells me what to do.

I wish my Daddy would play with me everyday.

I would not trade my Daddy for watching movies.

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Just for kicks, here's one about MY Daddy.

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My Daddy is the most wonderful Daddy in the world!

He is as handsome as a I'd like to be--amazing how many women used to bat their eyelashes at him when I was a kid.

He is as strong as a man 20 years younger. No wait, that'd only make him as strong as ME...

He can lift himself out of bed in the morning to help his friends with the most difficult favors, and is surely 100 ft tall in their eyes for it.

His favorite food is, I imagine, something fried up just right that used to swim in the river about an hour ago.

His favorite activity is probably anything that has to do with killing time in Matagorda.

In the good ole days when Daddy was little, he would do enough crazy crap to fill a book.

I think my Daddy looks funny when he dresses like Marilyn Monroe.

But I know he is really mad when he doesn't say anything--he was more patient with me than I am with THEBOY. No idea how he did that.

I wish my Daddy would hit it big at the dog track.

I would not trade my Daddy for Salma Hayek. Well... nah, I'll stick by that answer.

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Scattered memories of Pop...

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Him dropping me off at Papaw's for a few days when I was about three. When he picked me up there was a baby named Amanda at the house... Is it time for her to go home yet?

(Just kidding, Sis)

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The tire swing in the back yard on Akers Street he rigged up for me.

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The classy things he did over and over, setting an example I hope I can live up to: Never making an ugly scene or badmouthing our mother during or after their split.

Coming to our mother's house during a domestic dispute with one of her husbands, squaring off with him in the front yard and defusing the situation with one sentence (amazing).

Doing his utter best to handle my sister's emergence from childhood with sensitivity and aplomb. I had no idea what was going on at the time.

Tell me a bad breakup I had with a high school sweetheart was as bad as a divorce. It was a nice validation at the time, something I was sort of glad to hear considering how rotten I felt. Now that I know what the real stakes are, I suspect he was working some Dad psychology on me.

Putting up with me as a teenager--whoa.

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He taught me how to use a gun and a fishing pole. I peaked at "mediocre" with both.

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Became Juke's biggest fan, and remained so after my imaginary blues man went to his literary grave.

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Supported my freedom and made it clear that life in Brazoria County isn't the right path for some folks.

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Waited until I was 22 to hint that he wished I'd move out on my own. If ever there was a young man in need of a kick in the pants, it was yours truly.

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This isn't enough. I could sit here all night long adding bits. Sometimes it's simple stuff, like him asking me wistfully, "Son, wouldn't it be nice to be with a girl who smiles?"

It is, Pop, it is.

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Happy Father's Day (even if it is a bit early)