Friday, December 30, 2005

From Lake Jackson

We're here, the four of us. THEGIRL's not that sick and Kelli's better, so we all descended upon my old stompin' grounds.


Trip down... you know, for as long as it was, and as often as we had to stop, and the occasional headaches we had... it just didn't bother me much.

Some passing moments from the day:

THEGIRL holding court in Dairy Queen, fiercely defending her ice cream each time we offered to help her with it. TWO different folks asked us if she's two.

THEBOY needing to pee miles from any bathroom. Fine fine. We pulled off the freeway, onto a gravel parking lot of some sort, and I angled the van so he could have some privacy. He announced that he didn't WANT to go on THAT side of the van. "FINE, you go ahead and pee over there and show your penis to everyone passing by on that freeway, you hardheaded kid!" He changed his tune immediately.

Kelli, in the van, laughing hysterically at the above exchange.

Kelli, as I shooed a bee from the van, telling me it was "right there" as I nearly doubled over backwards while the angry little @#$% buzzed in my face. "I KNOW!"

THEKIDS, running around like monkeys in the hotel room as Kelli and I lay there, desperate for sleep. Kids 1, Parents 0.

The hotel manager telling me he'd make a point of not putting anyone in the room beneath ours.

THEGIRL immediately blowing kisses at Papa Briscoe.

And a good meal we had there with Papa and Mimi! Nice. Ham, yams, green beans, desserts... great stuff.

Papa himself, looking far better than when I last saw him. I think he's pretty determined to have us stay with HIM tomorrow night. After some time with THEGIRL he said, "That kid ain't sick" and started formulating a plan for us to stay there tomorrow. Not sure if we will. Depends on how tonight goes I guess.

Papa again, showing me a little acoustic guitar he bought! Neck is straight, fretwork is okay, tone's not bad. Action is just a little high, but it's very playable.

The circus that was trying to get those kids to sleep in the same bed tonight. We barked at them over and over until I went and just lay between them. THEBOY squirmed behind me, fearful I'd break wind like I'd threatened (I was KIDDING about that part when I said it), and THEGIRL watched me, kissing me sometimes as she slowly... faded... to... sleep.

And not only was it miraculous for her to finally BE asleep, but you know... watching sleep overtake her was glorious somehow.

And now I shall let it overtake me. Good night, sweet night.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

A Good Team

Thursday Thursday Thursday… it’s effectively Friday, right? So I’ve had my coffee and scone.

And there’s a department potluck today, so we’ve got sausage balls and all sorts of other treats. For guy who has dropped 20 pounds, I still eat pretty well, gotta say.


I asked THEBOY this morning if he’d like to play for the Texas Rangers.

He said no, he’d like to play “for a good team.”



The leg is holding up somewhat well. I ran another couple miles last night. And you know, at one point I was thinking about what a nagging injury this calf strain has been, and I actually thought to myself for a moment, I can take it easy this off-season to let it heal.

Yes, it seems I became a professional baseball player when I wasn’t looking.



Current music: “Sweet Hitchhiker” by Creedence Clearwater Revival.


The Rangers have a press conference due to start in about 10 minutes. This is presumably to announce the Kevin Millwood signing. Rockin’.


Work. Dang.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

The Hard Way

Can’t help but chuckle… my sister has twice this week shared stories of her daughter, just past two years of age, throwing ungodly fits, then stomping off—without prompting—to her bedroom for a nap. Slam of the door and quiet—naptime.

That’s just hysterical!


Things I have learned the hard way:

Krispy Kreme makes a fine doughnut, but six of them do not make a fine breakfast.

If by some twist of Fate I convince the wife that we should spend a little special time together behind closed doors, that is NOT the time to bust out with an Ed McMahon impression.

Don’t trust seafood that has supposedly been “cooked” by the acid in lemon juice.

Any time someone asks you to “come hold these two wires,” don’t. (Just kidding, Pop)

Despite what some experts say, meeting a dog at eye level is a bad idea. Sometimes, see, this dog is a Rottweiler, and he’s not thrilled to have you in his face.

When dining in a Thai restaurant, it’s best not to order a dish called “Nuclear Fission.” I’m not making this up.


Work beckons. Ya’ll be good.

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

BB am I Status Update

I'm in the process of making some changes. Nothing earth-shaking.

And come the first of the year I may fool around with the look a bit, see if any of their stock templates are better than this "Lawrence Welk gig at the Night Gallery" look I've got going now.


Not sure if anyone's interested, but I if you want to receive email notifications when I update my blog, email me or leave a comment accordingly. I can set it up to do that, and in fact, I guess it just emails the entire blog posting. If anyone wants to do this, I'll set it up shortly after the start of the year.


Sleep well.

Monday, December 26, 2005


Just a few notes before bedtime. I don't feel like hitting the sheets, but I'll regret staying up late in the morning if I don't go soon.


I finally ran tonight, 15 days after the last time. I could feel that sore spot in my calf, but it loosened up a bit over a couple miles. Really, tomorrow will tell a lot about what sort of shape it's in. It doesn't feel bad now, but it doesn't feel perfect.

Nice night for a run at least. There's something about jogging at night, man. I was at the high school track. Jogging north it's just pitch black. Jogging south you're headed towards the lights of the car dealerships, which are blinding. The stripes on the track literally look like the just fade into infinity.


You know, as far as I can tell, I don't get runner's high.


I mean... I've gone six-eight miles and get nothing. Is it supposed to come later? I do hit a good rhythm and all, and certainly during a good run the effort isn't awfully taxing. But nothing that feels like an endorphin rush occurs.


We have now seen all of the BBC version of The Office. We've rented both seasons, and last night we wrapped up with pair of specials.

I've gotta say, it's a brilliant little show. The first season I must have kept my finger on the stop button the whole time. It was too awkward, too accurate in some ways. But the big belly laughs kept me from bailing out.

Kelli was quicker to develop sympathy for David Brent than I. The second season was basically a chronicle of his downfall, and I was ready to watch him squirm. They taught us in lit classes that character flaws cause tragedy, right? Brent's almost nothing but character flaws.

In the specials, though, everything gets... you know, I don't want to say wrapped up. It's not as neat and tidy as that sounds. But it certainly ends on a less enigmatic note than it could have. And I was ready to wish some good fortune on Brent, oddly enough.

And in the interest of avoiding spoilers, I'll bow out now.


You know, THEBOY puts on quite a show when he plays his Star Wars video game. There's one with Yoda fighting a bunch of storm troopers. THEBOY stands up and hops around, spitting out the toughest-sounding stuff his five-year-old mind can muster:


"It's time to get this party STARTED!"

And my favorite:

"I got you in the penis!"



Good night.

Rangers News Flash

Jamey Newberg is reporting this afternoon that the Texas Rangers have agreed to terms on a four-year contract with ace starter Kevin Millwood.

I like Jon Daniels' approach more each day.

THIS could be the best rotation the team has had since '96: Millwood, Adam Eaton, Vicente Padilla, Kam Loe and Juan Dominguez.

Happy happy happy happy happy...


My baseball jones is workin' overtime.

Some scattered moments from the holiday weekend:

THEBOY's hands shaking with excitement when he opened a gift and saw that it's a movie he'd asked for, Batman vs. Dracula.

(He's watching it right now, in fact)

THEGIRL dancing to the Wiggles yesterday and today.

The bittersweet feeling when THEBOY opened a gift bought for him by Freda.

Seeing Val, who suffered acute kidney failure about 18 months ago. Her sister is going to give her a kidney in April. Awesome.

And that's not a word I mean to use lightly.


The trees in our yard... wow, it's like someone gave the order for them drop all their leaves at once. Holy cow.


A cold is sweeping through the house, dang it. THEGIRL's got another nagging cough (though it hasn't affected her spirits). Kelli's got head congestion, and I woke up with a sore throat. We've got a trip to Angleton planned for this coming weekend, and we simply cannot bring a bunch of sick folks to see still-recovering Dad. I'll bet that by trip time some combination of us will be healthy at least.

("Your mother and I are still sick... here are keys... you kids take the van to Angleton...")


THEBOY is fine.


I started to write a bit of a year-end wrapup, but I'm just not up to it. Been kind of up and down, right?

Ya'll take care, have a great Monday. Hopefully you're all off and sitting at home and/or with loved ones.


You know, it's nice outside. Maybe I'll take the kids for a picnic.

Sunday, December 25, 2005

Happy Christmas

It's Christmas morning, and the living room is a terrific mess. THEGIRL'S wrapped up in one of the new Wiggles DVDs she got, occasionally pausing to drop some toy in the bucket her Potato Head family came in.

And now she's dancing. Love it.

THEBOY got us up at 7:15. Not bad, 'cept we'd stayed up until 1am taking the toys he snagged in Corsicana out of the packages.

He's wrapped up in the VSmile handheld video game we got him. He also plays the Star Wars video game and the foam rockets Santa brought him.


He opened his gifts from non-Santa folks in Corsicana last night, and yeah, he scored a ton. He and THEGIRL were quite good, all things considered.


The evening candlelight service, while beautiful, also went about as expected. A couple songs into it THEBOY was quite clear: "I want to leave now. I want to go home."

He got his wish, as Kelli scooped up both the kids and took them back to her mother's house.


Kelli got me the very fine Darker Blues book from Fat Possum records. Exactly what I wanted (seeing as how I asked for it and all). And that cool cologne I wanted too.


I'd love to ramble some more, but the kids want to play

Friday, December 23, 2005

Chenille? Did She Sing with the Captain?

Just going to take a few minutes for a quick update here. Everything I HAVE to do before the holidays is done, but you know, since next week will be nuts too I’d better go ahead and get a jump while I can, right?


My secret Santa was Yvette. Man, she outdid herself! Today came the final gift: a $20 gift card to Starbucks and some little porcelain Beatles figures. Wow. We also got gifts from sales, which we picked at random. I got a chenille (like I know what that is) blanket, and you know, it’s perfect for me. Masculine colors even. At home there’s frequently a blanket within reach since I’m cold-natured and all.

Lots of folks brought gifts and such too. My little Joie got me a coffee-themed ornament, Mona gave me peanut-filled chocolate candies, Teri gave me a BIG scented candle… I’m quite impressed.


Okay, for a moment I’m going to talk about the sales aspect of my job without discussing how it makes my skin crawl sometimes. This being a proper, old-fashioned traffic department and all, the sales department appreciates how we affect their commissions, and they TOOK CARE of us this holiday season. We had two (2) good lunches courtesy of them this week, and the gifts they gave us were nice.

Now, I do wish to be mindful of just how materialistic this sounds. It’s not my intention to be that way; I simply mean to point out that in contrast to Belo, where my station didn’t so much as send me an e-card in appreciation, this place rocks.


Lunch was big, and I’ve nibbled on so many sweets that man, tonight’s Tex Mex is likely to be just an appetizer for me.


Marathon? What marathon?


Tomorrow we head off to Corsicana. It’ll be the first Christmas without Frida, and she will be sorely missed.


And the next weekend we’re headed to Angleton for the New Year’s holiday. I’m really looking forward to that!


I’d better boogie on with my bad self. Be good. Mostly.

Thursday, December 22, 2005


Man, the holidays are rough in my business. Everything's doubled up to accommodate the days off, and advertisers make all sorts of screwy demands and changes.

Have you seen any ads for this movie The Ringer? It's about a guy who pretends to be retarded so he can win big at the Special Olympics or something. It's one of my accounts.

Man, you'd think this thing was up for an Oscar or something. They have revised, and revised, and then revised the revised revisions. It's nuts. And really, the spots make me want to kick someone in the giblets. I'm working really hard to push something extremely tacky on people.

I'm in the wrong business.


It's been a real bonanza of good music lately though. Those Austin City Limits DVDs are quite good, and now I've got more stuff from Michael as well as something I ordered from NotLame.

So... quick rundown:

Unida--Got a couple of CDs by this former band of ex-Kyuss/current Hermano vocalist John Garcia (got all that? Hope so, because I don't feel like rewriting it). Damn, these guys were really good.

Blind Arvella Gray--I haven't read the bio stuff yet, but I gather he was a Chicago street musician. It's just voice and dobro, and I imagine these recordings are 20 to 30 years old. A very pleasant discovery. I'm glad to have this one.

Pugwash--Jollity. Ah, you smart pop fans need to hear this. Lush Beatles/XTC-inspired stuff. And they're... Scots? Jeez, I once knew, but my brain is full at the moment. This is gorgeous stuff.

Unfortunately, Bongzilla is a better band name than a band. Eh... didn't do much for me.


Message to Kelli: Begonias and horse manure, my dear.


Kelli got sorta rear-ended tonight. Not bad, and not her fault. But there's a small dent near the back bumper, and we're certainly going to look into getting this fixed.


My nephew is in Tae Kwon Do, and he got a stripe on his belt today! I hope my son will get wind of this and be inspired.


I have twice now dreamed I'm Spider-man. Yep. Last night I was going to "get" some kid named Billy. He was, oh, about eight years old, had red hair. I guess all the regular Spider-man villains were currently imprisoned.


I'm obsessing over this Kevin Millwood courtship. I think he could be the best pitcher we've had here since Nolan Ryan.


I set up in the garage tonight to peel and de-vein shrimp while listening to Pugwash, in fact. I think it's the most therapeutic thing I've done in quite some time.


I keep checking my grades, like one of my profs will come to his senses: "Whoa, I didn't mean to give that yutz Briscoe an A..."


The calf... it's much better. Not perfect. I may try to run on Christmas Day, maybe Monday. It's been nearly two weeks since I last ran. This is NOT the state I wanted to be in this close to the race. Ugh.


Need sleep. If I don't get to post prior to the holiday, you all be good, be safe, and have a terrific one.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Cringing, Laughing, Fetching

Gotta admit that I got this idea from some local morning DJs. I DON’T usually listen, and in fact I don’t know their names or the station.

But the idea interested me: What’s the worst thing you’ve ever said to a date/love interest/whatever?

And what’s the worst thing one’s ever said to you?


Now, I’m not going to get into anything lewd or ugly, but you’re welcome to.

Kelli and I still laugh over something that happened when we were dating. I’d been staying at her apartment probably five nights a week. As we walked in one evening, she turned to me and said, “I think I just want to sleep with the cat tonight.”

I laughed then, and I’m laughing now. That’s absolutely the worst line of crap I’ve ever heard. Jeez, I’m not OFFENDED if you, the single young lady, happen to want me, the clingy boyfriend, to vamoose for an evening. But why cook up such a line?


Most awkward: When I worked in the mall, this cutey who worked as a waitress over at El Chico caught my eye. But a similar-looking girl came to my store once, and for a moment I mixed them up. I asked if she worked at El Chico, and she said no.

I explained that she bore a resemblance to the other girl. And for some reason I found myself telling her, “But she’s actually got a MUCH bigger head than you do.”

And I could almost see the steam coming out of her ears as she stomped off.

My boss heard the whole exchange, and told me, “I don’t know WHAT you were trying to do there, but man, you really messed up.”

19 years later I’m still cringing. What’s the statute of limitations on making an ass of oneself?


From Toland: The thing with THEBOY reminds me of something. I've noticed watching Maria's kids that, as excited as children are about getting lots of stuff for Christmas, they get equally excited about giving presents to the ones they love. That gives me a warm feeling in my tummy on Xmas. After 12 years of retail hell seeing the holidays bring out the worst in adults, it's the only thing that makes Christmas worth a damn anymore.

Funny you should mention it: THEBOY gets just as obsessive over giving gifts as he does about receiving them. This morning, in fact, he fetched his Etch-a-Sketch from his room and announced that he wanted to wrap it and give it to his friend.


My Secret Santa kicks ass. Today I got a squishy baseball, a baseball pillow, and a palm tree-shaped neon light for my cube.


Almost lunch. Ya’ll be good.


Fat Possum, by the way, is a blues label. Best one in the country, in fact.


The final High Bias of the year is up. I've contributed a review of a fistful of fine Austin City Limits DVDs.

This is a labor of love on Toland's part, by the way. No idea how he keeps it up.

Send him money and nekkid ladies for Christmas.


St. Louis newspapers are reporting that the Cardinals have agreed to terms on a one-year deal with Sidney Ponson.

I’m quite relieved; the Rangers were very clear about their interest in him. I’d just like to go on record as saying that when the team’s owner tells the media a pitcher just finished 30 days of rehab, and that there’s plenty of time for said pitcher to do his jail time before spring training, this doesn’t bode well.


I won’t lie and say I really know what to think of the Rangers big trade yesterday. I do find it odd that, though this is supposedly a pitching upgrade, we needed to ADD to the rotation quantitatively, not just qualitatively. That is, one of the guys we were supposed to use next season has effectively been swapped for another.

Maybe we’ll get our #1 guy in Kevin Millwood, who visited (he actually came and visited!) recently. I don’t know why, but of all the free agent big names we’ve pursued, Millwood strikes me as a guy who might actually pitch here.


Okay, I’m done with people who think they’re above small talk. I’m not saying you owe anyone a debt of meaningless drivel. But you can be POLITE.

I’ve got one guy in mind currently. I almost typed “nice enough,” but heck, I guess he’s NOT.

Two recent examples:

At the holiday party, I made a point to stop him, shake his hand, and tell him what a great, timelessly classy look he sported with the suit and the vest. And he JUST LOOKED AT ME. Not a word. He kinda looked puzzled, in fact. I said, “Hey (insert name of putz here), it’s a compliment. Relax.”

This morning, the guy comes TO MY CUBE and stands there for a sec. I say, “Morning, (insert name of putz here).”

And he says, “Yes it is” and walks off.

Scratching him off the Christmas list.


Adding him to the wedgie list.


The van is fixed. It took way longer than necessary, and like everything I try to fix, I did it the wrongest, hardest way three times before figuring it out.

Yes, I know I said “wrongest.” And I’m sticking with it.


THEBOY saw my Secret Santa gift beside my backpack this morning. He picked it up and asked what it is. I explained that it’s a gift for a friend of mine.

He held it quietly for a moment, then asked, “Can I come?”

Sweet kid.


I told him no, that he’d be at school when I gave it to her. I explained that it’s a cookbook.

He asked, “Your friend doesn’t know how to cook?”


I love this stuff.


Happy Wednesday.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Fat Possum

wishes you Happy Holidays.

I got this in an email from them, and I find it all sorts of amusing.

Two Things

From the last 10 minutes here at the office.


First, Mona, while stuttering something, announced that she has "Tetris syndrome."



Second, as I walked into a coworker's cube behind her, I announced my presence so as not to startle her. "I didn't want you to turn around and say, 'Ah! It's a big ugly white guy!'"

And she said, "I'd never consider you to be big."


Monday, December 19, 2005

This Just In...

I got an A in each class!

I did NOT expect that... I'm thrilled.

I've met the conditions of my acceptance!


I'd make some snarky joke, but you know, I'm genuinely excited... I just don't have it in me.

Have a good evening, ya'll.

Looking Up...

I found the cable! It had fallen off the shelf in my study closet, apparently. Was tangled among some power cords, pretty well-camouflaged.


My dear wife went to the Nissan place in Irving today and got the part I broke. It was $10 and change. I’m guessing that’s about a 2000% markup.

I’ll install it this evening, and do my best not to crush it with my superhuman strength again.


One grade is finally in: I scored an A in Techniques of Appraisal and Assessment! Hot dog! That wasn’t an easy class either. Nearly half of it was quite math-intensive. I’m very pleased.


Three hours left at work…

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Everything I Touch...

The birthday party went well, all things considered. Boy I'm tired of throwing parties where no one shows up though. THEBOY had a total of TWO guests show up. Yeah, we got the invitations out late and all... but cripes, out of FIFTEEN that's all we could get??


But the entertainer was REALLY good, the few kids here were into what she did, the cake was good, and really it went off pretty well.


Last night I actually felt relaxed for the first time in a long, long time. Not everything the kids did wound me up for a change.

I fixed that in a hurry though. While changing a burned-out headlamp in the van I managed to break the plastic sleeve that holds the thing in there. Yeah. It basically crumbled in my hands. I've broken a lot of the damn things.

So, that broken part means the light won't sit in there straight. I've been laughed at by two (2) separate auto parts guys who tell me to hit a junk yard or dealership.

Neither of those happened to be open today.

Ah, replacing this part is now, oh, about 1000 times more complicated than it needs to be.


And I finished editing this year's family movie, only to realize that the cable that I need to make my dubs is gone. Boom, lost. Period, over and out, zip zilch and nada. I do. Not. Have. It.

Fine, I hit Best Buy. $40.99 to replace. Hoooo boy.

$39.99 at Circuit City.

BB is not amused.


This coming week at work is going to be rough. Double logs, crazy advertiser demands with the holidays upon us and all... Not sure how much time I'll get to spend updating this little site I'm afraid.


Wow. There's a Krav Maga school walking distance from the house.


Saw my boy Geoff (aka G-Par) this morning. It'll be the last time before he departs for DC. It was great to see him! Married now, being accommodated by Belo as he departs. That is, he gave notice and the managers grabbed his ankles and wept, begging him to stay. Okay, that's not true. But they did scare up a DC-area job to shove at him within hours. Good for him, I say.

Geoff, I meant it: I don't intend for us to become footnotes in each other's lives. Don't be a stranger bro.


Ya'll have a good week.

Friday, December 16, 2005

Surely. Maybe. Or not.

Whoa! Which Rocky movie had some huge Russian fighting his underdog American counterpart?


Well, tomorrow’s the big birthday bash. Like most things that have happened lately, it’s been sort of thrown together at the last minute, given the greenlight without a realistic idea of some of the particulars.

But I’m hoping there’s good turnout from THEBOY'S old school and his new one. He gave us a nice guest list from both. Now it’s just a matter of whether five days’ notice is enough for any of them to commit to coming. I know of one who’ll be there for sure, and his presence alone would go a long way. But really, with cake, an entertainer, goodie bags… I’d like a good turnout.


And then I’d like a nap.


Still no grades.

I am not pleased. My profs have had the last of my work for over a week. Admittedly, I turned it in early. But the latest due date was five days ago. Surely they’ve graded that stuff by NOW.



Or not.

where my optimism peaks

Friday Friday…


Again, I am woefully uninspired at work.


Spoke to Dad last night, and he sounded pretty good. He’s eating well! It was a really nice chat, I’ve gotta say. As eager as I’ve been to check on him, reports are that his sleep schedule’s messed up, and now I’m afraid I’ll wake him when I call. Got lucky yesterday though.


We’re thinking pretty seriously about taking a trip to Angleton over New Year’s, in fact.


Very cold this morning. It felt like a European cold, if that makes any sense. Had a certain biting chill that took a while to shake off.


You know, the place I grew up doesn’t have what a lot of folks would consider to be seriously cold winters. But you know, humid as it is, it can be harsh, it really can. You take a day in the 40s with a bunch of moisture in the air, and it’ll get to you.


We’re watching the 2nd season of The Office (the BBC version). Kelli’s read that this season, which we gather is the final one, is all about the downfall of David Brent.

Oh, this is gonna be sweet.


And I’m sorry, but I see an AWFUL lot of a not-so-far-removed boss of mine in Brent. Hoo yeah. A quote, best as I remember it: “You see, I like to build camaraderie with ‘humor’…”

That's from the real boss, not from the show.

There’s a physical resemblance too, heh heh.


So… I’m NOT one who ever holds much hope that we’ll sign big name free agent pitchers here. I’m quite used to the headlines in the paper telling us “(Insert prominent name here) Spurns Texas for Dodgers” or whatever. This morning it was Braden Looper, in fact. I didn't even bother to read where he DID sign.

But… Roger Clemens was at some award ceremony in Ft. Worth last night. The MC announced him as “the newest Texas Ranger” or somesuch.

Clemens is going to attend the Rose Bowl with fellow UT alumnus Tom Hicks on January 4 (do I have the date right?). And Clemens did say that he and Hicks would have some “interesting” things to talk about on that day.

I don’t know that I’ll ever LIKE Clemens.

But I’d certainly be glad to have him on our team.

And that’s about where my optimism peaks on THAT matter.


Something’s brewing with this other career path towards which I’ve been slowly steering for a while. Could be some phone calls today.


Get to work.

(I’m talking to myself. You can goof off all day. Tell ‘em BB said it’s okay.)

Thursday, December 15, 2005


Love this bit on Slate by a woman who did some nude modeling for some art classes.


The great Wayne “Twig” Terwilliger has un-retired at the age of 80. This man has been in pro baseball since 1948. After his formidable Ft. Worth Cats won their division title last season, he hung it up in September.

60-odd days later, he’s un-retired, taking a job as the Cats’ first base coach.


The birthday went well, and it ain’t even done yet since there’s still the party on Saturday and all.

THEBOY got to watch a lot of videos, Santa Claus called him, his cousin Aaron called him, we ate at McDonald’s, and he got some new toys.

He’s pleased as punch to be five now, lemme tell ya.


Calf still hurts, dang it.


Thursday, ya’ll.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

The Woodsman

I just watched this movie, starring Kevin Bacon.

Man, I don't know--really--whether anyone gets truly excited at the prospect of a Kevin Bacon movie. But you know, the guy has strung together quite an impressive resume. Heck, you know you still get sucked into watching Tremors when it's on TNT, right? Best dang man-eating-subterranean-giant-space-worm movie you're likely to ever see.


In the Woodsman he portrays a child molester, released from prison after 12 years.

It ain't exactly light viewing.

He's shunned by his family, ostracized by his coworkers, harassed by the police and still gripped by his compulsion.

This is one powerful piece of filmmaking.

Why wasn't this up for Oscars and such?


It's a fine line I walk with this stuff. Like my father, I can't stand to see something that purports to be entertainment that shows a child suffering.

I wondered if I'd have to cut this one off. It didn't happen.

But I don't think I breathed during 15 of the last 20 minutes.

This one... whoa.


Psych Misc

Some changes are forthcoming to the blog. From the average reader’s standpoint, it probably won’t make much difference. Still mulling exactly what I need to do. There is a chance that everything prior to 12/31/05 will go away forever.

The blog is not ending though. I’m just saying that if you’re dying to go back to, say, July of ’05 to have a chuckle about things like what I had for lunch, or how much coffee I had in one day… you’d better do it in the next couple weeks.


I’m eagerly awaiting my grades, of course. I don’t even know when they’re due. Seeing as how the semester ended so screwily (what with the freeze and all), we weren’t told when the grades will be in.

I was conditionally accepted into the program. For folks without psych undergrad degrees, they do that. I have to earn no worse than a B in these classes to continue.

I’m not awfully worried. Okay, a little, seeing as how I’m ME and all. But I had only one grade in either class lower than a B all semester, a 79 I got on my first paper. Unless I just catastrophically tanked on my finals, I’m guessing I’ll have a B in each class.

I’d like to swing an A in there somewhere though. 


I like this program, I like the folks in it. I’ve become buddies with some sharp people, and I’m thankful for that. One of them said recently she’d taken a good look around at the 28 new people in the program, and she figured eight would actually end up being counselors someday.


I agree.


It was nice, if a bit puzzling, to find myself as sort of a go-to guy when finals came around. People who hadn’t spoken to me all semester suddenly solicited my input, and that was flattering.


I’ve learned a lot about this field, of course, and I must say that at the moment I’m not inclined to pursue a doctorate. For psychologists, I gather doctoral work is largely research-focused, and I’m simply not interested in that. I want to roll up my sleeves and get down to the business of working.

I’m almost certain my education will continue for the rest of my life though. I mean, there’s the matter of continuing education as part of being a counselor. But I hope to become certified as a SAP (and before you say, “You’re ALREADY a sap, BB,” let me just clarify that as “Substance Abuse Professional”) and an LCDC (licensed chemical dependency counselor).

I left a really good LCDC program at a JuCo to pursue my master’s. I hope to get a chance to return. I still refer to texts, papers and notes from my time there pretty regularly.


Have a good afternoon.

4 Things

Ganked from Ulitave
four things meme

1. Fry cook (ah, Jack in the Box… 1st job…)
2. Record store clerk
3. Audio tech
4. Traffic coordinator

1. The Usual Suspects
2. The Kids are Alright
3. Cannery Row
4. Field of Dreams

1. Angleton, TX
2. Austin, TX
3. Euless, TX
4. Hurst, TX

FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH (currently on-air)
1. UFC Unleashed
2. Intervention
3. Uh… um… jeez… uh… eh, Monk is entertaining enough.
4. Whoa… really reaching here… Eh, ESPN is good for background noise even if there’s no sport I personally dig on.

But once baseball season comes back—look out!

1. London
2. Spain
3. New Orleans
4. Seattle


1. Tex Mex/Mex Mex
2. Thai
3. Italian
4. Japanese

1. At spring training in the Phoenix area… okay, so I’d need a time machine too since it doesn’t start until mid-February…
2. In Barcelona, sipping coffee
3. Fishing with my boy
4. In fact, being with my boy in general, seeing as how it’s his birthday.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Time to Smash Some Watermelons


I’m sitting here watching Spider-Man: The Venom Saga with THEBOY. We went to Toys R Us tonight to spend some of his birthday cash. He bought this and this remote-control dragon that’s actually kinda cool.


Tomorrow he won’t go to school; he’ll have a special day alone with Kelli, getting to do most anything he wants.

Tomorrow night he gets to watch Star Wars for the first time.


Saturday we’ll have a party here, with cake, pizza, and some sort of combination magician, puppet show and all-around entertainer.

I hope I haven’t hired Gallagher by mistake.


My calf is healing nicely, gotta say. Amazing what anti-inflammatories can do.


I ganked this from… somewhere. I think it was a Yahoo Sports story about one of the Rangers’ new acquisitions, Brad Wilkerson:

(General manager Jon) Daniels said Wilkerson's hard-nosed style could evoke comparisons to former Rangers outfielder Rusty Greer, a longtime fan favorite and a key part of the team's only three division titles, in the late 1990s.
"Montreal compared me to Rusty Greer when I was drafted," said Wilkerson, the 33rd overall pick in the 1998 amateur draft. "If I can do half as much as he did around here, it's going to be very special."

Now THAT’S a good attitude to bring to the new team. Humbly name-dropping one of the institution’s franchise players is a sure way to get MY attention.


Nice bit from J. Prowse in the comments an entry or two ago.

Man, you know… I’d say that I cut my teeth on books, but heck, I’m not finished. I mean, this love story has gone on my whole life. Nice to see the younger Prowse catch the bug. In a book-loving household such as ours, I certainly think our kids will share this passion.


Funny, I was flipping through a magazine today… Pulse maybe? And in it was a photo of the gazebo in Austin where the nutria incident occurred. Weird to suddenly see THAT out of nowhere.


Geoff gave notice today. I’ve said many times that he is irreplaceable. I wish him and Mel well in DC.


Time to do something I haven’t done in a while: Take it easy.

Monday, December 12, 2005


We had a good weekend. Having no class on Saturday morning was a strange feeling.

(“But BB, you never have class, so why was Saturday morning so…” yeah yeah yeah, ha ha)


Kelli did get her paper done while in Corsicana, somehow. Turned it in Friday afternoon.


I attended the KTVT holiday soiree solo, since in our frantic rush to, well, get THROUGH last week we didn’t think to get a sitter until about 5pm Saturday.

The party was nice for sure, held at the Wyndham Anatole. I managed to spend three hours eating and chatting with coworkers. Once the dancing and drinkin’ seemed to be getting underway in earnest I took off. Worked out pretty well.


No idea when I’ll get my fall grades. Since the official due date for one of the projects wasn’t really until today, I guess it won’t be that soon.


Had a decent five-mile run yesterday morning, though I pulled the bejeebers out of my calf in the process. Just over a month until the race, and this feels like bad timing. I need to be increasing my distance at this point, not hobbling around like I am. Dang dang dang.


We slept a lot over the weekend. I slept well, but I now feel pretty wiped out again.


Write to me. Tell me something good.

Thursday, December 08, 2005


From the one and only Jeff Prowse, whose thermometer read "-5" last time he reported in. Of course, he's in Wisconsin and all...


I’m not quite a blogger, but you are my loyal audience…so here’s a few words about that memory.

Even though he was killed late at night, news really didn’t feel official until you watched the story on the 5:30 network news the following evening. I was 11, my parents were 32. We always ate dinner at this time, and only rarely could I get up to see what was going on on the Walter Cronkite show, but the TV remained on in the other room. But on Dec. 9, we all got up and went to the TV room to see the story in full context. My dad said nothing, but I don’t think I’ll forget the pissed off look in his eyes.

This kind of celebrity death probably can’t happen again…because we don’t really much like any of the big name celebs…they are on a special island and we mock them.

Anyway, life goes on. I hate to guess at watershed moments and the death of an entertainer seems not worthy of such grandeur, but I can see that if were 20 years older, that could be a pencil mark line in life…on one side was my youth, the times you remember as being without shadows, and on the other side, well, mostly the bittersweet.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005


Rest in peace, Frida. We will miss you. Someday when the Rangers win it all I will think of you first.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

92 Days Excerpt

Posted this recently to another blog in the course of a discussion about authors. Thought I'd put it here too, just because it's that kind of day.

(If you gank yourself do you grow hair on your palms?)


A passage from Larry Brown's "short" story, "92 Days," which appears in the comp Big Bad Love. This is told from the perspective of an alcoholic writer. Alisha is one of his two children.


Alisha died right after that. They said it was crib death, SIDS, but I don't think that's what it was. I thought it was punishment to me for giving up my wife and my family and all the wrath of God howling after me all the days of my life to the ends of the earth. I wanted to go out into the forest and live like a madman with leaves for clothes and live in a hole in the ground and throw rocks at anybody who came near.

My whole family was there. I was stunned with all the marijuana and liquor I could stuff into myself and still remain standing. I signed papers, made promises, heard prayers and screaming and gnashing of teeth. Cried till my eyes were sore. I took on a pain that would never leave me, never let me rest until years had passed, and then it would always remain like lead that had settled in the bottom of my heart, a little sad face smiling up, reminding me always, even when I lay on my deathbed, Alisha, born wrong, Alisha, child of God, Alisha a soul wafting out across space with her tiny hands clapping.

Face the Wind

I dreamed I could fly. Again.

Spread the arms, face the wind and just… go… up...


Current music: “Capricorn” by Motorhead.


I was really hoping to squeeze in another good run before this winter storm comes. Phooey. Well, I guess I can still hit the rec center and work on the elliptical machine to maintain my stamina. Nothing prepares you to run like running though.


Current music: “High for the Ride” by Sea of Green


God, Jason Falkner was breaking up with a girlfriend at a recent DJ gig or something… someone on his BB wrote about it like it was some huge scoop, and plenty of folks have chimed in to speculate about musical angles in this ("he DID take longer guitar solos recently..." blah blah blah)… you know, what the hell sort of celebrity worship are we guilty of now? It’s not like he’s Paul McCartney (whom I gather is married to… someone).

What’s the gender of Ben Affleck’s baby? What’s that guy named this week… Puff Daddy? P. Diddy? Puff Pastry? I wouldn’t know Hillary Duff if she left bite marks on my butt cheeks.

So much I just don’t get.


Current music: “Evil Morning” by the Bellrays

Monday, December 05, 2005

Hot Stove in Dallas

THIS is cool. It's a blog by the Dallas Morning news sports folks, and it's being updated from the baseball winter meetings being held over in D-town this week.

I Hear the Yeti's Agent is Scott Boras...

Ever wanted to watch a Yeti hit a penguin with a club?

Me too!


That’s how uninspired I am today.


Had a good run yesterday, despite the fact that it was 40 degrees and windy. My ugly green hoodie was the perfect insulation for such a trek. I ran five miles in 51:40. I did actually work on my stride, tried to stretch out and see if I could cover more ground. But I know I slowed down when I got tired. At one point I believe I was lapped by a three-toed sloth. And that’s really odd since I didn’t think they’re indigenous to this area.


THEBOY startled me Saturday morning as I made my breakfast. He likes to sneak out quietly, then jump out with a loud noise.

“Bloo blah blah!” I believe he said.

I spun around and froze, both fists clenched as he stared at me.

It looked BAD.

“Do you want to hit me, Dad?”


I tried to explain to him that when you STARTLE Daddy, well, for just a second his cat-like reflexes take over, and he goes into ninja mode.



Sunday, December 04, 2005


Sunday night.

Today wasn’t so great.


I mean, it wasn’t a total shipwreck, but… this was one of those days where it felt like we did nothing but bark at the kids. Every button they could push, every boundary, every opportunity to ask a question 500 times when the answer was no the first time. It wasn’t just Laura either.

The approach of THEBOY's birthday and Christmas have sent this kid into full-blown gift obsession. Buy me buy me buy me. Holy Ronald McDonald can this kid bug us for STUFF. The Little Attorney, as he is sometimes known, was spinning a new angle today: Buy me this for my birthday, and because I won’t KNOW which wrapped gift it is, it’ll still be a surprise.

I thought I was doing him a favor by indulging him, hitting the toy aisle before groceries for some looking around. So much of the time we hurry through or past the toys.

But today I gave him a good 20 minutes to poke around. And this was AFTER telling him as we entered the store that we would NOT be buying a toy today.

I pried him out of there, started shopping for groceries, and you know, I became distracted. I mean, I was checking my mental list, comparing prices, all that. Then I realized I’d been fending off CONTINUOUS “buy me” requests for about 20 minutes and had to resort to DEEP DADDY VOICE: If you don’t knock it off I will sell you to the gypsies, kid. I’ll sell you to gypsies who feed little boys to their starving pack of man-eating alligators. No, that’s BOY-eating alligators… he’d catch that little discrepancy, the Little Attorney would…


And I’d already had it up to my eyeballs with THEGIRL. Hoo boy. Got pissy at the Italian joint over lunch. I think she voiced her displeasure at something by throwing some bread. Boom, g’bye bread. Sippie cup too, if I recall, so THAT got taken away.

She put both hands on the table and just SWEPT the food in my direction. This was a 22-month-old child doing her level best to knock $30 worth of pasta into my lap.

I considered checking in the kitchen to see if any of those guys were gypsies, but instead just went into DADDY DEFCON FIVE. Remove the child, take her outside and make the point very clearly. I was angry, but I’m not one to fly off and act in a rage.

But the message was delivered. THIS BEHAVIOR IS UNACCEPTABLE. This throwing trick has gone on too long. I’m going into zero tolerance mode on this. You throw it, it’s gone, period. I don’t care if it’s your lunch, your pants, the cat, whatever. You throw it and your association with this thing is done.

There’s always the chance, of course, that she’s throwing something she doesn’t give a hoot about. No worries: DADDY DEFCON FIVE will be implemented quickly and consistently. Little girl, it is time for you to retire this particular behavior. It’s going to prove to be nothing but a problem for you. I have much more experience with angry toddlers than you do with displeased daddies.


And you know… for every bit of rage in that child, for every glare that’s as obscene as any gesture she does not yet know how to make, she’s even sweeter. I kid you not. You want to see a cuddly kid, a kid content to treat her stuffed animals like her babies, who hands out kisses, and loves to pretend she’s putting her family members to bed?

When I tuck her into bed at night, after everyone’s gone I stand there and stroke her cheeks. She doesn’t move. If I start to pull away, she beckons me back soundlessly, with one outstretched hand. More stroking. Just the light touch is what she wants, even though I’m worried that my rough knuckles feel scratchy.

Eventually I have to go, and she gives a sad little cry.


There’s this level of vigilance one has to sustain while rearing kids that’s just exhausting. I don’t think I’ll be able to complete a thought or a sentence in the presence of one of my kids for 15 more years. The brain is always in two places, and it’s a heck of a way to get anything done. Each line in a newspaper I get to read is like a little gold nugget. “One… second… kid… I just know Dilbert’s gonna be funny today!”

And as much development as I’ve studied this year, I think there’s stuff we simply will never get clear answers for.

Check this out: As toddlers, both of my kids, when I’m sitting on the floor against the couch, have liked to leap off the couch over me and laugh as I lunge to catch them.

Furthermore, each child did this on his/her own, and I only discovered this little game when seizing this child from mid-air the first time. To them it’s a game; I’m going on pure instinct.

Now… how does one explain that each child liked to do this as a toddler? THEBOY no longer does it. He has not modeled this behavior for his sister.

Not nurture… so, nature? I don’t know that anyone’s likely to buy the explanation that there’s some sort of DNA-based wizardry compelling these kids to make death-defying leaps over my shoulders.


Boy, I’m really prattling on tonight…


Band rocking my world at the moment: The Atomic Bitchwax.


Message to, well, any band on the planet. You’re in, most likely, a digital studio cuttin’ tunes. You’re recording to hard disk perhaps, editing digitally, all that.


It kinda makes me want to claw my eyes out.


Intervention tonight was pretty gripping. Well, as gripping as it could be as I watched it while finishing up my appraisal/assessment project. There was Andy, the once-modestly successful actor/voiceover talent, and Michael the “rageaholic.” I hadn’t encountered the latter in my studies or experience before. Apparently there is something addictive about the brain chemicals released in a fit of rage. Michael smoked crack to calm down, but of course, when he needed to score he was violent.

In fact, we got to see him pick fights with his father, fights his father clearly wasn’t into. When push came to shove (and it did, literally), his pop told Michael he’d better take off, because he was about to get whooped. This was AFTER Michael had verbally abused him, thrown a beer at him and taken a swing at him, all on camera. His father didn’t seem to be violent at all, though that may be hard to believe considering that we got to see the guy stand up to Michael.

Andy was a pretty straightforward smack addict. Hustling his family for money, being a real jerk to them, all that.

The interventions were tense, but especially with Michael.

But they both went well, as the guys agreed to go into treatment immediately.

I believe Michael lasted three-ish weeks before being kicked out for threatening other patients.

Andy has been clean since July.


I need to hit the sheets. Ya’ll be good, have a good week. And let me know if you see any gypsies around.

Saturday, December 03, 2005


Watching something on Discovery on this weird-ass looking ape some speculated was a human/chimpanzee hybrid.

I'm not convinced.

But I am kinda freaked out.


Okay, so what's with the recent epidemic in these parts? It's the one where, if you're turning into the parking lot of a business, someone is exiting that parking lot and sitting right in the middle of the driveway. What the heck? Over and over this happens, and I have to wait for this person to leave before I can pull in. I mean... did I miss a memo or something? Since when can they take their 50% of the driveway outta the middle?


Long day, with a lot of good stuff.

I had class this morning. We got our grade back on our group presentation: 97! I do believe it was the highest grade in the class, though a presentation was given this morning that I thought was better than ours.

Had some work done on Kelli's car today, and it was not as bad or expensive as I expected. Cool.

Seeing as how Kelli and the kids took a daytrip to Corsicana, I had the day to myself. I took a nap, cleaned up a bit, and worked a lot on my final project for appraisal/assessment.


In Corsicana, Kelli and the kids watched a Christmas parade. The whole day went well, I'm told.


I spoke to Dad tonight, and he was in good spirits. Cracked some jokes, gave a positive impression overall. It was really refreshing.


SO, I'm hoping to finish this appraisal/assessment project over the weekend, then devote my weeknights to the eight-question development take-home final. It looks pretty rough, actually.


Disturbing sight of the day: a woman leaving Toys R Us with her two daughters. She was wearing a black t-shirt that read, "F*CK YA'LL I'M FROM TEXAS." Only hers didn't have the asterisk.

That's about the most startling lack of class I've ever seen.


So, how about UT today? Ouch. 70-3... I doubt either side really enjoyed that much. Come on USC!


I'm hoping to run in the morning. I haven't run since the episode that found me at the rec center, making 320+ right turns. It's been 10 days or so, and I do believe my knee is fine. I'll be pleased tomorrow if I can run five miles. Anything beyond that would be a bonus.


You know... I guess there wasn't much levity to be found in the hospital when Dad was there.

But once he left ICU, the nurse and tech in his private room took turns for a while coming in and explaining that the OTHER one was digging how his bare chest looked.

Now, we're not talking about beauty queens here, okay, but... dude... he's undergoing the health crisis of his life, and the nurses are flirting with him. What the heck? I guess it's like Kelli tells me: Studliness skipped a generation in my family.


What do you know? This freaky-lookin' ape is a chimp indeed, but one with markedly different genetic material from a standard chimp. He may be the only chimp of his particular sub-species.

I'm told the ladies just throw themselves at him.

Friday, December 02, 2005

The Ghosts Who Steal Diamonds



(Page 1)

One day a ghost was hunting in the city. He stealed 20 diamonds. But then something magical happened. A diamond fell out of a bat. Cause it was a magic diamond.

(Page 2)

And then when the witch says, "Why am I flying sideways on my broom?"

(Page 3)

Ghost (flying, with two bags): Ooh these bags are heavy. Because there's a big diamond in it.

(Page 4)

A diamond says, "Peekaboo!"

(Page 5)

Ghost: Wheeew!

(Page 6)

Ghost: Is there a rock flying above me?


(Page 7)

Ghost: Hey, I got even a bigger diamond.

(Page 8)

Ghost: Hey, who's coming down here? What a beautiful day!

(Page 9)

Orange ghost: I'm a changing-color ghost!

(Page 10)

Brown ghost: An invisible ghost is going to visit you!

(Page 11)

Green ghost: I'm the invisible ghost!

(Page 12)

I've got 3 diamonds for you!

(Page 13)

Red ghost: And I'm just like him!

(Page 14)

This is the biggest diamond in the world!

(Page 15)

The ghosts lived happily ever after.

(Page 16)

It's the longest diamond in the world!



Ganked from Ulitave:

If you're as completely exasperated by revisions (or whatever it is that you do all day) as I am today, why not post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me? It can be anything you want – good or bad – BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE. When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.

Snow Globe

This is messed up... but funny!

Florian Koppelstätter

Ah, here’s a bit about the short-term effects of coffee on the brain.

Not that I think it’s all that interesting. I just like the name Florian Koppelstätter.


And now it’s time for a random Myron Floren reference.


WOW… Launch is playing “Moody Girl” by Frank Stallone. It’s from the Staying Alive soundtrack. Anyone remember that movie? Me neither.

Anyone remember Frank Stallone? Barely? Me too.


Time for a final push in school… ugh.

Thursday, December 01, 2005


As I sit here, my very cute wife is at the table with her own laptop, wearing a Santa hat she's apparently forgotten about. Fair skin, black clothes, bright red hat... is it too soon to use the word "cute" again?


She's working on a paper for a class called (ready for this?) "historiography."


My classes are wrapping up too. Tonight was the last regular class in appraisal and assessment. Got some scores back: 89 on my oral presentation (he thought my citations were lacking in the written component), 88 on the test. I do believe I'm headed for a solid B in that class.

He wrapped up by giving us a heartfelt thanks and a farewell, saying he was "humbled" by the wisdom before him, and adding, "Welcome to the industry."

This class has been hard, and you know... I realized a few weeks ago that I pay attention about 99% of the time in there. How's that for a measure of success? Shoot, in that trainwreck stats class this spring I probably didn't pay attention 60% of the time.

There's something strangely awkward and nerdy and maybe a bit funny in that last sentence.


Amanda spoke to Dad today. Report: He's tired, very tired, but in good spirits.


THEBOY has not finished The Ghosts Who Steal Diamonds. What's there so far is quite good, but this could end up being an unfinished masterpiece.


Jeez, heard about this video the Dallas Morning News ( has on their website? It apparently shows four Mexican drug cartel enforcers being interrogated. They're handcuffed and sitting on black plastic (always a bad sign, right?). They've clearly been tortured and/or beaten, as many wounds are evident. Some off-screen person asks questions, and they provide details about assassinations they've done, who is corrupt, upcoming hits, that kind of thing. Then a gloved hand appears in the frame holding a pistol. It's placed to one's head.. the video ends. We don't see the man being killed, thankfully.

It's still gripping stuff. There's speculation that some private citizen or rival gang is behind this. Someone is killing the killers, right before our eyes (well, nearly).


And you know, the one who speaks the most looks almost cocky. None looks fearful to me, though I can't be sure of that. They had to know what was coming.


I took the Brief Symptom Inventory a few weeks ago in class. The BSI is an industry-standard test that gives a quick, accurate picture of anxiety, depression, anger, that kind of thing. We had the option of faking answers, giving real answers, marking random patterns, whatever.

I gave real answers.

Heh heh... I'd had a bad week, granted. But... the results got my attention.


And my obsessive/compulsive was off the scale!

Now excuse me, as I've been touching my laptop for too long and need to use some hand cleanser.


Can you believe it's been over a year since Larry Brown passed?


So, Kelli wants a backpack that'll lessen her back strain. Her dependence on mass transit makes a wheeled option not so desirable. Any suggestions?


Friday's a-comin', maw.

Little Gold Flakes

WOW. I know this has made the rounds before, but I’d never seen it. It’s a roughly three-minute clip of some Christmas lights you won’t believe. Snopes says it’s legit.


Current music: “The Soul of a Man” by Blind Willie Johnson


You should stop by Smackage There’s always something entertaining to read there, and one of the names behind those tiny photos and crazy pseudonyms is Nadine, my buddy from BACS. One of my few regrets about leaving that place is that I didn’t get to know her better. Mostly I remember talking about feet and British dental hygiene with her.


Ten random things about me:

I don’t use a snooze alarm.

These boots are one of the great bargain buys of my life. Got ‘em 7 or 8 years ago at the Brazos Mall in some nondescript shoe store having a big sale. The brand is Rugged, not that I’m familiar with it otherwise. But I think I paid about $12. They’re black, all leather, and warm. They also provide grip if I need to walk on ice.

I don’t care if a woman is flat as a board, but if she’s got disgusting feet the deal is off. (I’m married, so it’s not like there’s ever a DEAL anyway… hell, not that there were many when I was single anyway, and uh… hmm… why are you looking at me that way?)

I eat sunflower seeds when I drive. Keeps me awake.

I do believe I’m the only active fan of The Firm.

I once stumbled upon one of my bosses at a previous job having sex with one of our clients.

Two nights ago I dreamed I was Spider-man.

I’m not very good at doing nothing.

I don’t understand why, say, Turner and Hooch is available on DVD but Cannery Row is not.

I wish I knew what happened to the little gold flakes my great grandmother gave me when I was a kid. I think my then-stepbrother stole them.