Unlaid

Cartoon characters rendered as skeletons… cooooool.

***

Seeing as how this story is now making the rounds in the office, I thought I’d share it here.

Okay.

Back, oh, 15-16 years ago when Toland and I were both single, one of us (likely me) had the idea that we should go to a club and pick up some women.

Hey, this was a real stretch for the likes of us.

I hurriedly packed, grabbing clothes, tooth brush, CDs, everything I could think of and hit the road.

So we picked some godawful club. Loud dance music, flashing lights… And you know, the women didn’t exactly throw themselves at us. I can’t claim I had much nerve or that I really approached anyone. But I did find it odd that there was no eye contact, except between two sad young men who were way out of their element and probably ready to leave from the moment we arrived.

We did eventually leave, defeated, unlaid.

(Is unlaid a word? It is now!)

Back at Toland’s apartment, as we prepared to crash I looked in the mirror and saw my tooth brush in my shirt pocket.

Yes, it’s true.

***

So that sends some kind of messed-up message to any girl I suppose:

“If we get along, I’m spending the night!”

“I believe in good dental hygiene!”

“I’m a creep!”

“I’m a dweeb!”

Somehow I don’t think the tooth brush was the kind of protection Dad meant.

***

I’ve probably posted that story before. Sorry if that’s the case. I’m running out of material in my old age.

***

And Toland, if I’ve screwed up some of the details, feel free to clarify. I think that’s a pretty reasonable rendition of how things went down.

***

Now that club we went to in College Station… not that we had a chance there, but we had a far better time, eh?

(Women dancing=great. Men dancing=awkwardly unfunny)

***

Happy Wednesday.