Why do I have to shop carefully for bread that doesn't have sugar?
Why do both my kids turn up their noses at beef stroghanoff? What, it's noodles, meat, gravy... they won't even get far enough into it to get grossed out by the mushrooms.
Why doesn't anyone else I know think banda music is kinda cool?
Why isn't anyone named Bill anymore?
Why don't CSI and Law and Order just get their own channel?
Why do I have grey nose hairs? That ain't even fair.
Why do I have dreams that I'm drinking beer? I had one again last night.
Why do I find the name Buca de Beppo so doggone funny?
Why John Lennon?
Why has my professor encountered only one bilingual counselor during 23 years of private practice?
I'm listening.
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He visto la papa.
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2 comments:
Why do I have to shop carefully for bread that doesn't have sugar?
***Because everything has sugar in it. Haven't you seen Supersize Me?
Why do both my kids turn up their noses at beef stroghanoff? What, it's noodles, meat, gravy... they won't even get far enough into it to get grossed out by the mushrooms.
***Kids get grossed out by mushrooms? They'll come around eventually. Maybe if beef stroghanoff (which I loved as a kid, by the way) didn't look like elephant vomit...
Why doesn't anyone else I know think banda music is kinda cool?
***Any type of band that plays cumbias is alright with me.
Why isn't anyone named Bill anymore?
***I know people named Bill...the CEO of KLRU, my father...but come to think of it, I can't remember the last time I heard a child referred to as Bill, or even William.
Why don't CSI and Law and Order just get their own channel?
***Don't give them ideas.
Why do I have grey nose hairs? That ain't even fair.
***Any comment I have here would be wildly inappropriate (considering the even more annoying places grey hair pops up), so I'll just...move on.
Why do I have dreams that I'm drinking beer? I had one again last night.
***That body memory never fades.
Why do I find the name Buca de Beppo so doggone funny?
***He (she?) should start a TV show with Seamus McSwiney.
Why John Lennon?
***Bill O'Reilly and Pat Robertson would probably tell you that it was his immoral lifestyle that drew a gun-wielding maniac to him. But fuck them. The behavior of the violently insane simply can't be predicted.
Why has my professor encountered only one bilingual counselor during 23 years of private practice?
***Tells you something about which people America thinks it's important to help, don't it?
Michael
Wow, Mr. T. did a nice job answering your questions, so I'll take the night off.
Bill is a funny question. There are no kids on the playground named Hank, Dick or Vern anymore either. I think William is still in use, but the parents just go with the hipper "Will" or the royal "William".
My father is a Bill also. It's sort of a running joke with my in-laws family also...we go fishing together and out of a dozen guys, half of us are named Jeff, Bill, or Bob. Literally half or more.
Jeff P.
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